A new Christmas theme: let it be…or it is what it is
When you envision your Christmas, does it look like a Norman Rockwell Christmas…and then when it arrives, it’s more like A Christmas Story? It can be frustrating, especially if you try to force things or keep going over and over in your head how “it should be.”
Or maybe you are missing loved ones this holiday season…or simply feeling sad, and that sadness is only emphasized by all the holly jolly around you.
I know a lot of people are overwhelmed right now, so I wanted to share this poem with you. I hope it will bring you some peace.
Allow
There is no controlling life.
Try corralling a lightning bolt,
containing a tornado.
Dam a stream and it will create a new channel.
Resist, and the tide
will sweep you off your feet.
Allow, and grace will carry
you to higher ground.
The only safety lies in letting it all in – the wild and
the weak; fear, fantasies, failures and success.
When loss rips off the doors of the heart, or sadness
veils your vision with despair, practice becomes
simply bearing the truth.
In the choice to let go of your
known way of being, the whole world is revealed to
your new eyes.
~Danna Faulds
My Christmas wish for you
Whether your Christmas is joyful, melancholy, chaotic, surprising…or completely ignored…may you feel at ease with where you are in this moment.
Your turn
I’d love to hear whatever is on your mind today. Kindly share your thoughts in the comments.
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Image by Willgard Krause from Pixabay
Hi Christie – Christmas got a lot easier for me when I let go of my expectations and trying to have things how I thought they were supposed to be. As the kids got married and created new family units, it was selfish to think that I could keep Christmas Day as “my day” (although I gave it my best shot!) Now I go with what works to get us all together in one place – nothing fancy, just food, love, a few presents, laughter, and being a family – the Christmas spirit is a lot stronger when you’re being inclusive and flexible! Merry Christmas
Perfectly said, Leanne. Thank you and Merry Christmas to you and your extended family!
Hi Christie, lowering our expectations and being ‘at ease’ is the very best state of mind at Christmas. I let go of MOST of my expectations years ago as I always seemed to end up disappointed that Christmas wasn’t how I envisioned. Now, my only request is for everyone to ‘dress’ for dinner and pose for a photo. How hard can that be for 5 adults! Merry Christmas
Hello Suzanne. I agree dressing for dinner and posing for a photo is not a lot to ask. Now let’s talk about the definition of “dress.” Does it mean Sunday Best or anything but pajamas? 🙂
I’ve started relaxing my expectations the last few years, and it is getting easier. I won’t pretend I’m 100% there yet, but I’m trying. I get to see my children and their children close to Christmas, but not always at the same time. I’m happy we all get together either for Thanksgiving or a family Christmas dinner. (Just not on Christmas Day.) I still look forward to seeing my siblings and extended family over the holidays. I have to “let it be” that mom won’t be with us in person, but I am sure she’s still with us in spirit.❤️?
Hello sister. As families expand, it does get more difficult to hold tightly to the old traditions or just to get everyone together all at once. And of course, there is letting go of those who are no longer with us physically. I definitely see Mom in each of us and in the fact that we are carrying on her tradition as best we can. I think she would (is?) applaud the effort. See you soon!
Hi, Christie – I agree with ‘letting it be’ while also being open to change and new experiences. They just might be even greater than we could have imagined!
Such a good point, Donna. If we are open to it, sometimes…maybe always…what evolves is exactly what we needed and truly beautiful.
Once we let go of unrealistic expectations – of a holiday, of ourselves, and of others – the season can be so much better. I think it has always been hard for many but in the age of social media, where images of “perfection” abound, it can be ever harder. Merry Christmas to you and your family!
So true, Janis. Perfection is a myth and only serves to spoil the pleasure in what is. I try to use the holidays to remind me to make the time and effort to express my love and appreciation to those I care for, to spread kindness and generosity to all, and to enjoy the things that make me happy…like peppermint bark, homemade cookies, and Christmas music. For the most part, those things are within my control. Merry Christmas to you and yours!
Nothing Norman Rockwell about any Christmas I remember, but not quite as nutty as A Christmas Story either. Somewhere in between most years, not perfect, not pathetic. Wishing you have a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year.
I’m guessing Christmas falls somewhere in between perfect and pathetic for most of us, Ally. And I’ll take that perfectly imperfect. Enjoy your holidays, wherever they fall in that spectrum!
I’m hosting a whole family party on 27th and honestly have no idea if I’ve got everything I need to feed them or to prepare for the mad games that we’ll play. However, your blogpost just emphasised my current state of mind: it will be whatever it will be and we’ll have a good time, regardless ( and if it’s a flop, it will be remembered with hilarity for years to come – like my duck sauce 15 years ago).
Today’s your party day, Caree. I hope it is going well. I love your attitude, though, even if it’s technically a flop, it is a success in that it gives the family something to laugh about in the years to come. Enjoy your family!
Oh, Christie…what you have written here speaks to me. I keep thinking how things should be. How this season of life should look. In my head, it should be peaceful, and routine and comfortable. But it isn’t. And as much as I stomp my feet and cry and carry on, things seem to be the way they are. And not the way I think they should be. Maybe in 2022 I will learn to better go with the flow or the rapids!!
I can relate, Leslie. I’ve spent a lot of physical and mental energy in my lifetime trying to create something perfect, only to have the reality pale in comparison to the vision. I have learned (and keep learning) that if I can relax and enjoy what is without worrying about what “should be,” the reality is often pretty wonderful…or leads to something pretty wonderful eventually. Hang on and enjoy the ride!