Don’t worry; be happy

Piper, making fun where she finds it
If you want to be happy, be. ~Leo Tolstoy

Don’t worry; be happy. But what if the thing I’m worried about is that I’m not happy enough? We’re only on this earth for a short time. I want to make the most of it, and that means experiencing joy as often and as deep as I can. But that’s a pressure all of its own. I have a lot in my life to be happy about, and if I’m not feeling as joyful as I think I should be at any given moment, that leads to worry that I’m not happy enough. And the vicious cycle begins.

We’ve all been there–at least I hope I’m not the only one–you’ve planned the perfect vacation, been dreaming of it for months, but your plane gets delayed and you miss your connecting flight, or you arrive only to find your room is next to the noisy elevator or a crying baby, or you’re looking at the beautiful beach through a sheet of rain the whole trip.

Or perhaps you’ve planned a special holiday celebration for the family, been working on it all year, but when the big day arrives, the children are cranky or the turkey’s a little dry, and your shot at the ideal Thanksgiving is ruined again this year.

Maybe being “happy” isn’t about the big events in our lives. Maybe that’s just too much pressure with too many variables that we can’t control. Perhaps we should focus on the little things that we can control. I recently read a great article that recommends 21 simple actions that instantly make you feel happier.  (Thanks to Kevin Gwynn, for sharing it.)

I’ve tried most, if not all, of these and have chosen three of my favorite to share with you. I’d love it if you’d share some of the little things you’ve discovered for feeling happy.

  1. Smile. Duh. But seriously, research shows that just the act of smiling reduces stress and makes you feel happier. Smile at everyone you see throughout the day. Watch a comedy. Tell a joke. Whatever it takes to bring on a genuine smile.
  2. Listen to music that makes you feel good. Can you really stay in a bad mood with your favorite song blasting in the background? When I’m feeling sluggish, I turn on my running playlist for an instant energy surge. Just want to smile? I choose “You Always Make Me Smile.” The corners of my mouth automatically turn up.
  3. Do something good for someone else. It doesn’t have to be a big service project (though it might be). The simple act of paying for someone’s coffee or holding the door for a coworker whose arms are full can have a positive effect on your mood (and theirs) for the rest of the day.

Okay, it’s your turn. What tricks do you have for bringing on the joy?

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18 Comments

  1. That’s what we have to do, don’t worry be happy, worrying helps nothing. I just think about my grandbabies and it always puts a BIG old smile on my face. Thank you Christie for linking up and co-hosting at the #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I shared this post.

  2. Hi, Christie – I like the Tolstoy quote…and the three actions that you shared that can help make you feel happy. Previously, I did some research on the topic of happiness. According to what I read, here are some other variables that directly help to contribute to happiness:
    • Close relationships of caring and support with family and friends.
    • Actively engaged in meaningful activity.
    • Gratitude.
    • Having awareness of your own strengths and virtues.
    • Regular sleep, healthy food and exercise.
    • Spiritual engagement and meaning.
    And as you mentioned…..
    • Engaged in caring for others.

    Thanks for sharing this!

    #blogginggrandmotherslinkparty .

    1. I am also concerned about the political troubles in the U.S. and the violence around the world. I make a conscious effort to control what I can–how I treat others and myself–hopefully with the utmost kindness. I’m glad I could provide a little perspective through Tolstoy. Thanks for visiting and commenting.

  3. Great ideas! I have a whole Facebook page dedicated to “Choosing Happiness.” I try to see what is good about a situation, no matter what it is. Sometimes it’s harder than others, but I think I’m getting batter at it.
    Thank you for sharing at #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty

    1. Thanks Lori. I’ll definitely check out your Choosing Happiness page. It’s a work in progress for sure. It’s been fun cohosting the #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty with you.

  4. I’m in total agreement with your 3 simple actions. Each one does help me to feel happier. One thing that works for me, and this might sound crazy, but sometimes I just think to myself “I’m having a moment”. Such as when it’s a beautiful sunny day I like to go outside and sit with my face to the sun and think “I’m having a moment”. Or just sitting down in solitude and enjoying a cup of coffee and having a moment.

    1. I love that Teresa. It’s good to remind ourselves to notice all the beautiful little moments during the day. Each night, before I go to bed, I write down three good things that happened during the day. It’s helps me savor those moments again, and it also keeps me mindful during the day, watching for those three good things. Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment. I’m going to try your “I’m having a moment” tip.

  5. I so wish I could turn my brain off and not worry or be concerned. I love your suggestions. Thank you for linking up at the #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I shared this post.

    1. Easier said than done, isn’t it? I have found taking these small steps helps. Now that it’s warming up (most days at least–spring is unpredictable here in Utah), getting outdoors is a great mood lifter for me. And, of course, spending time with the grandchildren. Thanks for stopping by.

  6. I love that picture of the little girl hanging upside down on the porch railing, and I remember (vaguely) being that carefree many years ago. How sweet! Thanks for your wise words. Thank you for linking up at #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I’m sharing your post on social media.

  7. I find that being present in the moment helps create happiness and satisfaction. For example, whenI am out for a walk in nature, I turn my thoughts away from inner worries and instead notice the feeling of the sun on my skin, the way the trees look, and the buzzing of the bees. Or when I am doing a creative project, I focus 100% on it and get completely immersed. Happiness is a byproduct, rather than something that can be obtained directly.

    I found your link through #Blogging GrandmothersLinkParty.

    Jude

    1. Thank you Jude. I agree that I feel the most happy when I immerse myself in the present moment (or sometimes reliving happy memories, especially with someone who shares those memories). I love your perspective that happiness is a byproduct, not something you can obtain directly. Thank you for taking the time to comment.

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