The ups and downs of my first year of retirement
I was shocked to look at the calendar recently and realize I have been retired for a full year now. This is really and truly my life…not a vacation or a sabbatical…but my every-day life.
So now that has settled in, looking back, do I have any regrets?
Not. A. One!
What I love about retirement
The simplest things bring me the greatest retirement joy:
- Staying up a little later and waking up naturally to morning light and birdsong…or sometimes the neighbor’s dog or the beeping of a truck in reverse…but even that beats an early-morning alarm.
- The flexibility of scheduling appointments and travels at times that suit me. Case in point: late yesterday afternoon I thought, “I could really use a massage.” I went online and scheduled one for the very next morning. Mission accomplished.
- The increased time to spend recreating with friends and family…or simply relaxing with a good book or a jigsaw puzzle.
- The reduced stress…no deadlines, no personnel issues, no work problems to solve.
What I still struggle with one year after retiring
The biggest challenge I have at this point is figuring out whether experiencing and spreading joy is enough to justify my existence here on earth, or should I be contributing in some grander way to the greater good. Have I earned the right to relax and enjoy this phase of life, or do I have a responsibility to put my freed-up time and energy to work for a better world?
I continue to go back and forth on this one…but at least I can do my contemplating poolside!
Your turn
- At some point, do we earn the right to relax? Or is that selfish in a world where there are so many things that need doing and so many people that don’t have that luxury?
- For my retired friends, what do you love about retirement? What do you struggle with?
- What else is on your mind? Anything at all; I just love to hear from you.
Hi Christie, I am at peace with it all. My thinking is that I paid my dues and earned my right to relax and live by my own design. After living in a 55+ community for a year, I have no doubts that this is the time to seek joy. If not now, when?
I agree, Suzanne. I think I just let the ingrained need to perform bubble up once in a while, but you said it well: if not now, when?
Hi Christie – so much of what you wrote covers what I’ve felt over the last few years. I think the last part about wondering if I should be doing more is what motivated me to go back to work last year. Now I’ve re-retired, I’m still trying to figure out if there’s something “more” I should be doing to justify my existence on earth……but I’m also reminding myself of what Suzanne said above -I’ve also paid my dues, and after 40+ years of working, and stewarding our finances well, I’m well and truly allowed to just “be”……and so are you. We’re rocking this retirement gig – and I’m looking forward to seeing where the journey continues to take us. xx
We have paid our dues, Leanne, and as you pointed out, planned ahead for this time of life, so we do deserve to enjoy it. I think I just need to remind myself of that once in a while. So, yes, let’s see where this journey takes us!
Has it been a full year already? Time has definitely flown by!
You are contributing to life in so many ways — you definitely make a difference.
Contemplating life’s big questions poolside is definitely the place to do them!
Thank you for the reminder, Donna, that I am contributing to life in lots of little ways. I need to get over the feeling that it has to be challenging or difficult to count.
Christie, firstly huge congrats on your first year of retirement and how well you’ve used the time. Time not dragging, no complaints of boredom, just satisfaction and no regrets.
I understand your feelings. In a world where so much is wrong, it’s hard not to think we ought to do something. What I’d chuck in for consideration is that we’re not all Mother Teresa, most of us are simply not wired that way, but a sense of duty and/or a desire to make a difference can make us feel angsty or bad when we put ourselves first. And when that’s how you feel, times of transition can be challenging. Hopefully you’ll come to an acceptance that you’ve given – and given generously, or an opportunity which works for your new retired state will present itself to you to meet this need.
Thank you, Debs. This is exactly what I needed to hear. I’m no Mother Teresa, but that doesn’t mean what I have given doesn’t count, or that I have to keep giving more. And as you pointed out, perhaps an opportunity that feels right will present itself to me in the future. Thank you, as always, for the words of encouragement and for sharing your insight.
Hi Christie, you raise a very good point in wondering ‘if whether experiencing and spreading joy is enough to justify my existence here on earth, or should I be contributing in some grander way to the greater good. Have I earned the right to relax and enjoy this phase of life’. I think this shows your wonderful generous nature first of all but also highlights that nagging voice we seem to have inside of us, asking if you have earned the right to relax and find/spread joy. I have it at times but I then kick myself and say yes you have earned that right and you deserve this life you’e made for yourself. It’s a wonderful time of life for all the positives yo mention. I can’t believe it’s been a year already! I agree with what the other comments say too, we are rocking this stage!! Continue doing it in your own way 🙂 A lovely thought provoking post!
Thank you, Debbie. Reading all these encouraging responses has really lifted me up and reminded me that I am not alone in trying to figure this out. We have worked hard for the lives we are enjoying now, and one never knows what the future holds, so it is best to embrace the joy in our own unique ways!
Christie, My current statement is “I worked for 32 years with no life, now I’ll live for 32 years with no work!” I had horrible work/life balance when I worked, so yes, I do believe I’ve “earned” this time of life, to choose what I want to do. I continue to make little ripples of impact. I’m not saving the world, but I do hope I’m making a difference in how I live. I can tell you that you do as well. Also, when it’s the right time, something might come across your path that you’ll say – that sounds interesting for me to make a slightly bigger difference. And you’ll have the time and energy to do it!
Oh, I like that, Pat. I worked at one job or another for 45 years, more than 20 of those in a demanding leadership position. So yes, I have earned the right to live without work. And as you point out, we are still having impacts in our own small ways. I also appreciate the reminder that just because I’m not involved in any major cause at the moment doesn’t mean that I won’t in the future. Now is the time to rebuild my reserves and enjoy the moment. Thank you.
I think everyone, from the day they are born, has the right to relax. A little in each day. But we also need to feel productive and useful, or linked into the community otherwise a lot of isolation sets in and I think that brings other issues.
But enjoy that sunshine by the pool! Looks lovely. #WWandP
I agree, Lydia, relaxation should be part of our lives throughout our lives. Perhaps what I’m working through right now is what counts as useful and finding the balance between relaxation and productivity. I’m sure I’ll get there.
Because we have had careers, and mostly also raised families, we get caught up on making our contributions…and I know I have. BUT…and I feel now, at 73 I can finally let go of “what else could/should I be doing” because… I gave, and gave and probably not much back to me.
Both my husband and I never schedule early morning appointments if we have the choice. It’s the now much slower starts to the day we relish.
May your version of retirement continue to go well for you..no-one else, no other measures…just YOU.
Great to see you sharing a post from your blog on this week’s Wednesday’s Words and Pics Link Up. I hope to see you next week too. Warm wishes, Denyse.
What you say makes sense, Denyse. It’s at least partly the way we are programmed in our early work-centered lives. I too love those slower paced mornings. It truly is one of my favorite parts of retirement.
it is hard to believe it has already been a year! we miss you but you have totally earned the right to do whatever you want, when you want. enjoy it freely!
It is crazy how fast that year went, Stacie. I miss the people, but not the work commitments. Thanks for the words of support.
You need not feel any guile. I’d suggest that relaxing and enjoying is a way to work for a better world. It’s not like it’s an either/or, it’s more like an approach to life now. Congrats on your 1 year retirement anniversary
Good point, Ally. It doesn’t have to be either/or. I hadn’t thought of it that way.
Phooey. Spellcheck changed “guilty” to “guile.” 🤨
Gotta love spellcheck! Also, I’ll work on feeling no guile or guilt. 😁
Spelling never was my strength… 😑
I too struggled with what now…..…but as I am in my 5th year of retirement and soon to be “70” I have come to terms with it! My focus now is more on staying healthy and staying active. I love that my husband and I are available to babysit our 6th grandchild for the first time ever when needed and spending more quality time with family. Also we have become much more social and have made more new friendships (including you and Larry) in the past few years!
Hello Patti! It’s nice to hear that you have come to grips with the “what now” of retirement. There’s hope for me yet! I also am focusing more on healthy habits and spending time with those people I care about. We are really looking forward to spending some of that time with you and Bob soon.