24 Comments

  1. I don’t have the mother’s guilt like that even after raising 4 daughters. I don’t have to. My mother hands out ample for both of us. In other words, she uses her mother’s guilt for evil. LOL I gave up being perfect years ago and it was so liberating. I find living with guilt is such a waste of time. All we have to do is learn from it and move beyond it. Easier said than done, I know. This is a beautiful post that will give just the right encouragement to so many moms out there!

    • Good for you Pam! I agree, unless you can use a little guilt to change something for the better, there’s no sense in lugging it around with you. The truth is I have a lovely relationship with my mother and my children, so I’m ready to silence the guilt. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  2. Sounds like you’re a great daughter and mother, try not to feel guilt, life is too short for such. I don’t feel guilt. I know I was a good daughter and I did the best I could as a mother…plus and it’s a BIG PLUS – my grandbabies sure think I’m an awesome grammy 🙂 Thank you Christie for linking up and co-hosting at the #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I shared this post.

    • Thanks Dee. I also have wonderful relationships with my mother, children, and grandchildren. None of us is perfect, so there’s no point in wallowing in guilt over perceived errors. Honest reflection and adjustment, yes; but not unproductive guilt. Thanks for all you do for #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty.

  3. I think a little mommy guilt helps balance things out. If you never consider whether you’re doing your best, you’re probably not. If you alway doubt yourself then you’re not doing your best because your loved ones want you to be confident!
    Thank you for sharing at #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty

    • Thanks Lori. I like the idea of considering whether you are doing your best and taking steps to improve things, but not expecting perfection–from yourself or anyone else. It’s a pleasure cohosting #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty with you.

  4. Cindy

    I do experience the mommy guilt, even now sometimes and my kids are grown and I’m a grandma. But I know I did (and do) the best I can. I don’t think I can ever say “No” to anyone without feeling bad and worrying about it. I guess I know what I need to work on!

    • I have a hard time with “no” too. On the flip side of that, I have a hard time asking for help–probably because I’m afraid the person won’t say no even if they don’t really want to do whatever I’m asking. 🙁 I guess I know what I need to work on!

  5. Thank you for sharing this very honest and open Mother’s Day post, Christie. I am greatly enjoying getting to know you #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I have shared this post on my social media.

  6. Thank-you for this great post. I too have been that grumpy mother, overwhelmed with too much on my plate. Somehow, my three children grew up to be wonderful, amazing people, and now I have grandchildren to love and spend time with.

    I found your post via #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty.

    Jude

    • Yes, Jude, aren’t grandchildren the best–and pretty amazing that the children we raised brought these wonderful beings into the world! We must have done something right, huh? 🙂

    • It’s true, and honestly I don’t spend a lot of time feeling guilty. For some reason, Mother’s Day does it to me. Thanks for co-hosting at #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty, Clearissa.

  7. Mother’s guilt is something that we can shed as we enter our “older and wiser” years. As a grandmother and mother to two 40-somethings, I let the guilt ship sail away into the sunset years ago. Thank you for linking up at #BloggingGrandmothersLinkParty. I’m sharing your post on social media.

  8. We place so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect Christie and perceive others to be better than us. In reality we are all doing the best we can. If we have love from our family we must be doing something right. Thank you for sharing such a personal view with us at #blogginggrandmotherslinkparty. Have a beautiful day. I’ve shared

  9. What an honest, heart-felt post. My mom lives in Kentucky and I live in Texas. Both of my daughters live out of town. I feel like I am forever trying to balance my free-time among the three of them. Phone calls, visits, text messages, snail mail cards and letters. Some days i feel like saying “I’m dancing as fast as I can!!”

    We all do the best we can. I know your mother knows you love her just as my mother knows I love her. We don’t have to have Hallmark proclaim that for us. Or a special annual holiday.

    • Thank you Leslie. I love that description “dancing as fast as you can.” Make sure you take time to enjoy the dance. That’s what it’s all about. I guess we’re lucky to have this “problem” of so many people to love.

  10. Christie this post really touched my heart – it’s so hard to get it right isn’t it? I also wonder if I do enough for my Mum and I managed to offend my daughter with my MD post so I failed Motherhood 101 big time on that one! I’m finding increasingly difficult to get the balance right between keeping everyone happy and allowing myself to have feet of clay. (And I so totally got the church service guilt – that has happened to me back in the toddler days too!)

    • Leanne, thanks for sharing your personal experience. I guess we’re all just doing the best we can. The important thing is that we love our parents and our children–and ourselves–the best that we know how. I hope you had a chance to check out a couple of the links from my post. I found those articles quite helpful. Here’s to trying again another day! Hugs!

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