What do you do when you can’t sleep?
You’re lying in bed, the minutes ticking by, but sleep just won’t come. Unfortunately, this scenario becomes more frequent for many of us as we age. (I know, I know…we’re all sick of hearing “…at a certain age, you can expect…[insert something annoying].”)
Experts say age-related sleep disruption is due primarily to changes in hormones and lifestyle. Some suffer more than others. But whether sleeplessness happens occasionally or all-too-frequently for you, what do you do when it happens?
Here’s what I typically do…not what any expert says you should do, mind you…but what I actually do.
1. If I’m being mindful, I lie as still as I can and focus on my breath. This doesn’t always lead to sleep, but is generally restful. Unless it goes on too long, at which point I am liable to start questioning why I’m not falling asleep and contemplating how unfair life is.
2. Other times, before I can stop myself, I start composing my next blog post in my head…or planning the following day’s activities…or even the rest of my life. This never leads to sleep and often spirals into nonsensical thoughts spinning through my head, at which point I revert to #1.
3. If sleep just won’t come…and luckily that’s not too often…I get up, and keeping the light as low as possible, read a book. This only works if I have a printed book. I’m afraid the artificial light of an ebook will ruin any chance of sleep. Just another reason I love paper books.
Your turn
So, that’s what I do. I would love to hear what works…and doesn’t work…for you.
- What is your go-to on those nights when sleep doesn’t come easily?
- Do brilliant ideas come to you as you are falling asleep or does your brain turn to mush?
- What else is on your mind? Anything at all; I just love hearing from you.
Hi Christie, I have problems sleeping in periods, and I’m the opposite of many… I take up my phone and read a good book. I have plenty of books in Apple Books, and reading in my phone is so much more convenient when you’re in bed, than going for a “real” book. And normally after a while I fall asleep. I’m not really bothered by the artificial light. Perhaps because of the “night” settings in Apple devices? I’m not sure. Sometimes I do some journaling in my notes app instead.
Oh and I loved your statement about “at a certain age…” ! 😀
Hello Susanne. While I prefer paper books in general, I do love the convenience of digital books. And since you have to have an artificial light to read a paper book as well, perhaps there isn’t such a big difference on how they affect your sleep.
Hi Christie I have never been a good sleeper even as a child. My mind I think just is constantly on ‘go’ . Now that I’m older I value a good night’s sleep although they are rare. I love the feeling of waking up rested and ready to take on the day. I’ve accepted that I don’t sleep well and appreciate the times that I do.
#WWandP
I don’t remember having problems sleeping as a child, Sue, but as an adult, I’ve gradually had more and more difficulties. I know what you mean about appreciating a good night’s sleep when it comes. It’s wonderful.
Hi Christie – I don’t have too much trouble falling asleep, but I do wake often during the night and have those times around 3am where I feel I’ll never get back to sleep. (It’s worse atm with my left side still being so tender from my op). I do the gradual relaxation technique where I start from my toes and work upwards and a bit of the 4-7-8 breathing thing. Trying not to let my brain think too much is the key too. I’m grateful that I sleep reasonably well – many don’t.
Deep sleep is definitely something to be grateful for, isn’t it, Leanne? Focusing on the breath helps to keep my brain from overthinking, but sometimes I catch myself thinking about the breathing…Am I doing this right?…Why am I not getting sleepy?…Should I try something else? It does help now that I’m retired and I don’t have that added pressure of knowing the alarm is going to go off way too soon.
Hi, Christie – Your suggestions are good ones. I usually am a great sleeper so sleepless nights are rare for me. But if I truly can’t sleep, I pop in my earplugs and listen to an audiobook. I am usually snoring before the end of a couple pages! 😀
Good idea, Donna. I don’t know why I hadn’t thought of using earplugs and audiobooks. Sometimes when I get up, I do listen to meditative nighttime stories, but for some crazy reason, it never occurred to me to use my earplugs and stay in bed. Thanks for the tip.
I loved your ideas…and I can add mine. I use Sleep Stories from my calm app quite a bit if sleep doesn’t come easily. I know there can be a few reasons why I can’t sleep easily: too much on my mind (!) or I haven’t done enough physically that day. However, on the score of what amount of sleep I am getting its usually into 7 hours. Great to see you join in for Wednesday’s Words and Pics. Next week it will be the 10th one! I am enjoying our connections via blogging each week and hope you are too. Denyse.
Great suggestion, Denyse. I have listened to some sleep stories on the Simple Habit app when I don’t have a book to read, and they seem to work. It’s probably actually better than reading, because it requires less brain power, and the soothing voice adds to the meditative effect.
I can’t believe it’s been 10 weeks for the WW&P link-up. I’ve participated each week that I’ve posted anything new that week. Thank you for providing the opportunity to link up with other bloggers.
I’m a good sleeper. It’s my superpower. Occasionally when I can’t sleep I lull myself back to sleep by thinking about what I might write about on my next blog post. Amazingly such ruminations put right back to sleep. It’s really quite a gift when you can bore yourself to sleep.
You’re a lucky lady, Ally. Sleeping is a fabulous superpower. I used to be able to lull myself to sleep with blog post drafts or even “daydreaming” about pleasant things to come, but recently that kind of thinking has gotten me stuck in a half-awake/half-asleep state that isn’t particularly restful. I’m not sure what changed, but I’ve moved on to Plan B.
I find that when I am getting good exercise in (lots of steps or some good cardio), my sleep is much better. When I wake up at 3AM and truly cannot go back to sleep, I get up and go read or write. Often I just need to get whatever is in my head onto paper! Luckily, being retired, I can always take a nap later on in the day.
I do find that a day where I’ve been active and fully-engaged in my activities leads to better sleep. Also, not eating too late in the evening. It is nice now that I’m retired to not have the added pressure of worrying how soon the alarm is going to go off. Rarely do I need to get up as early as I did when I was working. I’ve been avoiding napping for fear that might make getting to sleep even more difficult.
I usually fall asleep okay, but often wake up and can’t go back to sleep. First I glare at the clock for not being morning yet, then I change position and command myself to go back to sleep. This occasionally works. If not, next I try slowly breathing in to the count of seven, then slowly exhaling to the count of seven, for 7 repetitions. This actually works sometimes. If not I repeat, starting with glaring at the clock. I know I should try getting up or reading but I never do.
Glaring at the clock is always the first step, Cindy! I typically try reading when I can’t fall asleep to begin with…not too often if I wake in the middle of the night. Recently I’ve tried listening to “sleep stories” on my meditation app, which are basically short stories told in soothing voices. It allows me to keep my eyes closed and not turn any lights on.
I’m a terrible insomniac Christie and have been since I was a child. Once I get to sleep I’m fine, but my mind is so busy it always took hours and hours to get to sleep. I tried everything from meditation and sleep apps to weird sounds or white noise.
I must confess about 5-6 years ago my doctor prescribed sleeping tablets and they changed my life. I’ve recently had to change doctors though and not sure my current doctor is happy to keep prescribing them which worries me.
I’m not opposed to using sleep medicines when you’ve tried all the good sleeping habits and it’s not enough. I know there are some disadvantages to regularly using sleeping pills, but there are also some real disadvantages to not sleeping!
I’m not a good sleeper. Never have been. My brain won’t shut down. I also find myself composing blog posts in my head but that makes it worse. My typical response is reading. I’ve finished many books on sleepless nights!! The only consolation is, I know I’ll sleep great the next night!!
Composing blog posts in my head doesn’t work for me either, Linda. That is good if one poor night’s sleep leads to a good one the next night. I get really annoyed if I have two bad nights in a row.
Great tips Christie. I rarely have trouble sleeping but when I do I always turn to a book or soothing music.
It’s a blessing to be able to sleep well, Debbie. And I agree that music and books are excellent go-to solutions for occasional sleeplessness.
During a period of insomnia (which went on for months), I used to get up and read (a real book as you say). I tried most things except drugs, and the only one which worked was an accupressure bracelet. Probably the most important thing though was acknowledging I was unhappy in my relationship and needed to do something about it.
My nightly ritual now is to listen to a guided meditation, then a sleep story (or as many sleep stories as it takes) from my sleep app. If I really cannot get to sleep, I get up, leave bed and take myself to my favourite chair where I wrap up in blankets and try again. Sometimes the change of scene is what works. Frequently, I don’t even make the end of the meditation as I rarely have trouble sleeping.
I have not heard of an accupressure bracelet for sleep, Debs. That’s an interesting option I’m going to look into. As you say, it’s important to address any underlying causes of sleeplessness. I’m glad you worked yours out. I like the guided meditations and sleep stories, and like you, I have noticed that sometimes a simple change of scene works for me as well.
Trying to catch up on my blog reading. So behind. Always.
PC has been sick with a cough for almost 2 weeks. Was back to the doctor yesterday and has new meds on board. We were both so worn out last night that we went up to bed at 7:30. I asked Alexa to set an alarm for 8:00 so we could get up for church and she asked me if I wanted the alarm for 8:00 pm (a half hour after we went to bed) or 8:00 am (the following morning). At first I wondered why she was asking pm or am. Then I realized how early we were climbing into bed!! We slept great, though, and PC is definitely on the mend.
Do you stay in bed/in your room when you decide to read? I worry about waking Paul if I get out of bed and worry about waking him if I stay in bed and read/toss and turn. My daughter keeps telling me we won’t get divorced if we sleep in different rooms now and then…as in when one of us is coughing all night.
I’m glad to hear that PC is on the mend and that you got the rest you needed that night at least. I too worry about waking Larry…whether I stay in bed tossing and turning or I get up and read. I just try to be as least disruptive as possible whichever I decide. I laughed at what your daughter said about sleeping in different rooms. I do know a few happily married couples that sleep separately at least occasionally due to snoring or illness.