42 Comments

  1. Tiffany

    I think it’s important to forgive yourself. I tend to be better at forgiving others, and berating myself for my mistakes. I will try to cut myself some slack this year. 😀

    • Good point Tiffany. Forgiving yourself is at least as important as forgiving others. Maybe flip the scenario in your mind. How would you speak to a friend who had done whatever it is you are berating yourself for. Happy 2019 to you and the family!

  2. Christie, this is a great post for the New Year. Forgiveness is not easy. But it heals the forgiver as much as the forgiven. Thanks four the reminder. Happy to co-host
    with you at the #BlggingGrandmothers End of the Year Link Party!

  3. Happy New Year, Christie! In my yoga class, we practice inhaling (taking in the new oxygen to rejuvenate us) and exhaling (letting go of all debris or anything that we want to leave behind). I find this deep breathing practice helps in many ways, including forgiveness.
    A fresh start is nice. Coincidentally, I’m hosting a monthly Wellness link up with the first post due tomorrow January 9. The optional prompt is “A Fresh Start”. Please feel free to link up. #MLSTL

    • I love that breathing exercise, Natalie. I do a similar thing and it’s surprising how much that simple exercise helps. I’d love to link up with your wellness group and look forward to seeing those posts.Thank you for the invitation.

  4. Happy New Year Christie. This is a great post to kick off 2019. I know from experience that forgiveness is extremely difficult. After many years of hanging on and resisting it, when I finally did manage forgiveness, I felt so freed up and able to continue with a happy life. Until then, I was becoming quite bitter and twisted. #MLSTL Shared on SM

    • Forgiveness is difficult, especially if the hurt runs deep. I’m glad that you were able to manage it and move away from the bitterness of resentment to the freedom of forgiveness. Happy New Year to you Jennifer!

  5. Happy New Year, Christie! It is lovely to have you back with us at our first #MLSTL for 2019. I love the idea of starting with a clean slate and you are right that in order to move forward we need to let go of the past and resentments, forgive and then move forward. Wise words as usual and thank you for sharing with us. Have a fabulous week. xx

  6. Happy New Year Christie – what a lovely post to start the year off with. You’re absolutely right – forgiveness should be unconditional. I often joke that I don’t have the focus required to hold onto a slight so tend to forgive easily…of course, there have been exceptions to this rule & this post is a reminder of that.

    • Happy New Year to you as well Joanne! I’ve gotten much better at letting things go and seeing others’ “faults” with loving compassion as I’ve gotten older and had more life experience. I’m even getting a little better at forgiving myself for mistakes or less than stellar choices. We’re all human. Hopefully, we live and learn and progress. Have a wonderful week!

  7. Forgiveness is so important isn’t it Christie? I’ve met a lot of bitter older women and it stems from a hurt that they never moved on from. I have no intention of being old and bitter – I think it’s time we all took responsibility for our own happiness and forgiveness is a big part of that. Letting past hurts go and learning and moving on is a great way to start a new year.
    MLSTL and I’ve shared on my SM 🙂

    • Those are wise words, Leanne. I want to enjoy this phase of my life, not spend it fretting over some wrong that’s been done me. My mother is a great example of this. Her husband was murdered 60 years ago, and then just four years ago, her youngest son (my little brother) was killed by a reckless driver. Those things are hard to forgive, yet while she mourns the loss of loved ones, I have not seen any bitterness in her. I figure if she can forgive that, I can forgive the little things thrown my way.

  8. Forgiving others is so difficult sometimes, but harboring the anger and resentment is so much worse. I have seen people become bitter, old and angry because they would not let the resentment go.

    I also agree with your comment, “The point of forgiveness is not to convince another person to change his or her behavior or to get an apology.” If we wait for that, we could be waiting forever! It’s up to us. We can only control ourselves. Thanks for much for these wise words.

    • That’s an important note, Candi–we can only control ourselves. We’ll drive ourselves crazy if we focus our effort and worry on trying to change things that are outside of our control, like other people’s opinions or behaviors.

  9. Oh, my. I am not terribly good at apologizing…just ask my husband. But I don’t often hold a grudge. So that’s something, right?

    I know people who are consumed with ill will and hard feelings toward someone from their past. Life is too short or too long to go around resenting someone for all of it! And resentment is giving someone power over your own life and feelings.

    Sometimes easier said than done but I like the idea of letting bygones be bygones!

    • I love that you said life is too short or too long to spend it resentful. So true. Forgiveness is all about your own freedom and taking control. I do believe most people are doing the best they can at any given moment anyway. Thanks for sharing your thoughts.

  10. Christie, I was working on releasing resentment last fall and find I need to think about that again…it’s similar to forgiveness, I guess. I believe I will add it to my yoga practice this month… using breath for release – resentment, stress, anger. Thanks for the inspiration. visiting from #MLSTL

  11. A very thought provoking post Christie! I enjoyed not only reading through your post but also the comments – you have some very wise people here! As to the year ahead, I’m looking at TIME, how to get more of it and what to do with it! Sharing for #mlstl

    • Oh yes, use of time is a big one, Debbie. For me, a lot of it has to do with being present in the moment and truly enjoying the time I am in. Good luck in 2019! I’m excited to see where it takes us.

  12. Christie, I’m a little late in catching up to blogs, but I so agree with your perspective on forgiveness. It has nothing to do with the other person. I’m focussing on my winter bucket list and my 101 list instead of on New Year’s Resolutions – but the new year is always a time to ‘push a little more’. Thanks for the reminders in this post. #MLSTL

    • Thanks for checking in, Janet. I’m also focusing on my bucket lists rather than New Year’s Resolutions. I still find 1/1 to be a great time to re-evaluate and push reset if necessary.

  13. You only give the other person more power and control over you when you refuse to forgive. It is poison! I have so much I want to enjoy with the time left on this earth. Mindful meditation and being in the now are wonderful ways to avoid ruminating about past hurts. You can set healthy boundaries to protect yourself from it happening again. Thanks Christie! Sharing on Facebook and Twitter for #MLSTL. 🙂

  14. What an inspirational post for the new year – many of us can learn so much from this! I really enjoyed this great article and I hope you don’t mind but I added your link in my regular feature Monday Magic – Inspiring Blogs for You! Claire x (PainPalsBlog)

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